So to recap: We won some money on a Lottery scratchcard, and set off in search of the 10 greatest bargains to beat the Credit Crunch…but each had to be under £1. Here’s the list…from Number 10 to Number 2!

Number 10 – Mini TV remote

Amazing grace turn me on.

I know…you can’t believe we’re starting off with such an amazing item…but the quality in this top 10 is such that it occupies this position. Wow. Just wow.

Miniature tv remote for £1!

A keyring this cool should come with a frostbite warning.

Number 9 – Sewing Boutique

It's a Cuggi medical emergency!

15 rolls of thread stuff, ‘assorted needles’, a tape measure…all of these items could easily take a solo spot in this list, but together?! Unstoppable. You’ll see more of this lot as I use it to perform open-heart surgery on Cuggi, the black and white dog.

Number 8 – 25 Glowsticks

Feel the glow...

Yeah, you read that right. TWENTY-FIVE GLOWSTICKS. And they glow for AGES! And they’re long enough to wrap around your arm…or link them together and make them into necklaces or nunchuks. It’s up to you.

I glove you

At 4p each, you don’t need to hold yourself back too much.

Number 7 – Nailbar

Since my adventures with manicures in Hangzhou, I’ve been trying to keep my finger-nails in shape. Not in a gay way (although I’ve got nothing against the gays…oh God here we go…I don’t mean ‘the gays’ I mean…oh screw it…IN A GAY WAY K?)…


All I wanted was a single nail file…turns out POUNDSHOPS don’t roll like that…welcome to the 40 piece nail behemoth!

Number 6 – 30 Disposable Razors

Razor (cash) light

So in keeping my reputation as Mr.VG (Valcro Guy), I need to keep my facial hair UNDER CONTROL. With thirty razors for £1, it’s easy AND good for the environment*!

*That’s not true.

Number 5 – Beard Trimming Kit


Ok so I messed up, but give me a break here. After buying the 30 razors, I saw this…magnificent beast. A proper, high powered (and I mean I’m scared to put it near my face high powered) beard trimmer, brush, scissors and something else (I can’t really see what it’s for but i’m sure it’s useful too). For £1.

Number 4 – Interesting game of child


Don’t be confused by the title, as only the most rebellious or terribly raised children will be interested in these games!


It’s got chess, erm…some other things…and ROULETTE! ROU-TURFING-LETTE! For £1. You know what I say to that? D**L.

Number 3 – Jesus Clock

Oh GOD I'm late!

You can’t buy your way into heaven, but this clock surely can’t do you any harm. With special End Of Days style alarm, it’s the perfect addition to any (righteous) living room.

Number 2 – DUDE, THAT’S MY MOM!

So you’ve never misread a DVD case?

Dude, where's my dvd?

Recently I have suffered NO END of abuse about my favourite comedy film, Dude, Where’s My Car?. I mean, what’s not to like about:

Jesse and Chester, two bumbling stoners, wake up one morning from a night of partying and cannot remember where they parked their car which prompts them on a journey to find it.

Unfortunately, in some respects, Dude, that’s my mom! is not the followup to this comedy classic. After looking a bit deeper however:

Dude, I can't read!

Sexy Moms are wet and waiting! Are you a Mother F*****? It’s the ultimate MILF s** romp with the hottest cougars in the business. Phyllisha Anne and Sandra Romain homeschool two young frat men in the art of a***. Lauren Kain makes Chris Evans and Mikey Butders c** to momma!

(I added the *’s to make it look more e*citing than it is).

Well! That’s it! £9 down…£1 to go…

COMING SOON! Beating the Credit Crunch – Part 3 – The Winner!


  1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA had fun watching the DVD?

  2. styill waf5tvhing vrey hardd tyo type witgh oner hands

  3. this is called Corruption. You win

  4. it/s h4rdr to tywpe woth one finget ehile thikninh of whsat u werw doint whlie typunf the comeent abobe!

  5. you’ve bought quite a lot of grooming products…shavers, clippers, ebony boards, glow sticks. are you dressing to impress (peacocking) in Shanghai???

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