Christmas Day (圣诞节)

As this year was the first time that Oytun and I had been away from our families for Christmas, we decided to try to have a traditional celebration. Or as traditional as possible.

今年是我和Oytun第一次没有跟家人一起过圣诞。我们决定过一个传统的圣诞，尽可能传统的。

We promptly went to Tian zi fang (田子坊) (often referred to by its most famous street, Taikang lu (泰康路)), a network of super-tiny, super-trendy, art-inspired cafés, restaurants and galleries. Coz that’s where we usually hang out at Christmas.

我们快速去了田子坊（这个地方经常和一条有街的街泰康路一起被提到），那是个很小，很时髦，聚集了很多特色艺术的咖啡馆，餐厅和画廊的地方。那是圣诞节我们通常会去的地方。

We picked the most Christmassy place we could: A Thai restaurant which doubled as a museum and teddy-bear-making-training-facility. Coz that’s what we usually eat for Christmas dinner.

我们挑了个最有圣诞气氛的地方：一个泰国餐厅兼一个博物馆和教做泰迪熊的地方。那是我们在圣诞节通常会吃的东西。

The best bit? For every Xrmb (I don’t know what X=。。。but it wasn’t too insane) you get a free handmade teddy!

最棒的部分？是只要消费（我不清楚要消费多少，但是不是很夸张）你就可以得到一个免费的手工制作的泰迪！

Needless to say, the combination of great food and stuffed animals means this place is a superb place to take a date. Just remember to act suprised when you pick up your fourth free Dinga in as many weeks…

不用多说，美味佳肴配合这些小动物意味着这是个很棒的约会的地方。只要记得在以后的几个星期，当你拿到第四个玩偶后，仍然要表现出一副惊喜的样子…

After we went to celebrate Gcobani‘s pending birthday (no he is not Jesus, he was born on boxing day. More like Mike Tyson.) On the way out we saw one example of a crossover between the Chinese Hanzi (汉字) character system and English. Something had to give:

在我们庆祝了Gcobani还未到的生日以后（他不是耶稣，他生于圣诞节的第二天。更像是迈克泰森），在我们出去的路上，我们看到一个间于中文汉字和英文的标志。让我不得不提：

Ok so it didn’t end up being too traditional, but it was fun!

嗯，显然最后这天并不是那么传统，但是非常有意思！

ps, TRS and RMS! I’m thinking of you today! NEVER FORGET THE JACUZZI!

另外，TRS和RMS！我很想念你们！永远也不会忘记按摩浴缸！

I feel like such an idiot.

One of my students (LOLOLOL!O!LO!LOL!) asked me for some help on a crossword today. Of course I accepted….

…but I couldn’t get the final two clues. 12 and 13 down…can anyone help?

Happy Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone!

Herpes massage

…just £5? I’ll take two.

Eating old people

When trying to save money, it’s probably a bad idea to go for a ‘quick drink’ with colleagues. Especially with new colleagues. Especially with new colleagues who all don’t have to work the next day. Thanks guys.

So…today I woke up with no money and even less dignity…and where better to go when you’ve hit rock bottom than:

It’s a University for old people. Courses include painting, drawing, dancing and…eating! Ok it’s not a course, but they have their own super-subsidised canteen! It’s hidden on the 14th floor of an office building…

…and had quite a special view! IT’S MY APPARTMENT!

I considered taking my fake grey moustache in order to pretend to be an OAP…but I was warned that old people can see through even the best disguises due to their experience in World War 2.

As you can see, I was spotted immediately by one old codger, but it seemed like he was macking on some other hotties in the queue so he just looked at me like “Game recognize game” and I nodded in agreement.

We queued up for the grub (after buying the food ticket – 8rmb (£0.80)) and a little posse formed behind…

…but they all looked pretty depressed. What the hell?! No appreciation of the amazing bargain they were about to snaffle up. Their loss.

Everyone inside the cantina seemed totally focussed on eating. Could the food really be so good that they didn’t want to chat to each other?

Well, yes.

My eyes were like BOOM! Three fish pieces (带鱼), crispy ‘sweet and sour style’ pork (古老肉), more rice than I could eat in one week (米饭), aubergines in sauce (茄子), two types of green/yellow vegetable (青菜 + 白菜)(cabbage? I admit I suck at veg vocab. Sue me.), and soup (海带汤). EIGHTY TURFING PENCE. And you know what…it would be 60p if it hadn’t been for the friggin’ Credit Crunch and the practical devaluation of the GBP. CHEW ON THAT! (chew!)

Lose Weight Exercise/”>Lose Weight Exerciseup.jpg” alt=”This is not an egg plant” title=”This is not an egg plant” width=”400″ height=”300″ class=”alignnone size-full wp-image-1036″ />

The green stuff was actually (and I am not crossing fingers, toes or anything right now) delicious. It was certainly the best veg I’ve had in China so far…and I even ate the aubergine stuff even though I usually hate it.

OMG LOOK OUT FOR THE BONES THO!

So yeah…a flippin’ feast for less money than it costs for 2 chicken wings from KFC. They don’t deliver though!

Weird vending machine update

Chunz sent me this epic photo in response to my last post…Best thing in Heathrow…and I think she’s topped it!

A stationery vending machine! Well you weren’t expecting it to move were you? sorry.

Anyone got any more?

Best thing in Heathrow

I can’t sleep on planes dude to my (self-diagnosed) ADHD, so my biggest fear when travelling on one is that the tv screen won’t work. And they won’t move my seat. And I have nothing to do. Nothing to do.

NOTHINGGGGGGGGGGGG.

I’m freaking out with boredom just thinking about it.

When I went into the final waiting area before my flight, I panicked – my netbook battery was dying, I had no papers, no books…what if the unthinkable happened? Sweat started pouring from my head (metaphorically speaking).

Then I saw it. It was like a shining beacon of hope.

How sweet is this?! I admit I’m a sucker for vending machines for non-edible products (and an even bigger one for edible stuff) but this took it to the next level….

Then I saw it…

Just £4! Delivered! Well delivered one metre…but still…

It came in its own heavy duty cardboard box…with a ‘free bookmark’ which looked suspiciously like a piece of the box ripped off (but I’m not a hata, so I give them the benefit of the doubt)…

The finished article.

Ok I really feel like a country-bumpkin now.

How to do music notes, love hearts and other symbols in Facebook status updates and chat

You now know how to add Facebook emoticons to your chats, but do you want to know how you can add hearts, music notes and other cool symbols to your Facebook status and chats?

There are two ways!

1) Copy Facebook symbols from here!

2) Do the Facebook symbols yourself!

This works for some people and not for others, but each of these characters can be typed on your keyboard using the ‘alt’ button.

First, if you’re on a laptop make sure you ‘Num Lock’ is on! The ‘Num Lock’ button is on the top right of your keyboard.

Next, hold down ‘alt’ (the one in the bottom left of your keyboard) and press type the following:

If you find any other really facebook symbols, leave a comment and let us know!

If you’re looking for normal Facebook chat emoticons, click here!

How rumours start…

Until recently, 95% of Chinese textbooks were printed in Ghana.

However, contracts with publishers in Africa have recently been reviewed by the Chinese government due to suspected ‘subliminal messages’ being implanted into the minds of the youth of the country.

I’m not sure there is any hard evidence though.