Let’s beat hunger – together! (对抗饥饿——一起！)

I have Google adverts on a lot of the pages on my website. These ads are very clever, because they ‘scan’ the page that they’re on to see what sort of content it is about, and then put adverts up there accordingly. Theoretically, if I talk about buying turkey in Shanghai in an article, then if there’s a company who advertises with Google selling turkeys in town….the ad will be there.

我网站上有很多Google广告。这些广告都很聪明，因为他们总是出现在和他们广告内容相关的页面上。理论上说，如果我的文章里提到在上海买火鸡，那么Google里面卖火鸡的公司的广告….就会出现在那儿。

One small problem, however, is if Google doesn’t know what you’re talking about on a page (or if nobody wants to advertise on a page which talks about McDreamy from Grey’s Anatomy looking like Iran’s leader). In this case, they will either put a solid colour (no ads) or PSAs (Public Service Ads). These ads are generally pretty plain and served on behalf of charities and other community groups – and usually are nothing to do with what is on the page.

不过还是有个小问题，如果Google搞不清你的页面是关于什么内容的（或者如果没人想在讨论‘实习医生格蕾’中的McDreamy长得像伊朗领导人的网页上刊登广告）。这种情况下，他们可能会放全色（无广告）或者PSAs（公益广告）。这些广告通常都很平淡无奇，为一些慈善机构或者其他社会团体服务。

Sometimes though, even a PSA can be relevant…

不过有时，即使是公益广告，也能做得很深刻…

Google really knows how to fix EVERY problem in the world!

Google真的无所不能！

Welcome to Shanghai (上海欢迎您 )

The last couple of weeks have been a bit of an eye-opener for me. A new colleague arrived in my office, and it’s made me cast my mind back to the first few weeks of my time here in China.

前几个星期算是让我小开眼界了。一个新同事来了。很多情景让我回想起我刚到中国的那几个星期。

I was super-excited when I arrived in Shanghai 20 months ago – so excited that I totally ignored nearly all of the faults which, to newcomers, are often obvious.

20个月前到上海的时候我超兴奋-由于太激动了以至于忽视了很多对于一个新来的来说很明显的不足。

The air-quality was atrocious (it’s ok, just hold your breath!), the weather was uncomfortable (that’s what aircon’s for!) and the hygiene of some places, like restaurants, leave a lot to be desired (but McDonald’s in Shanghai is so cheap!).

空气质量恶劣（只要屏住呼吸就没问题了！）天气不舒服（那就是为什么要有空调！）还有有些地方的卫生，比如餐厅，还有很大的提高空间（可是麦当劳在上海非常便宜！）

The one thing that was undeniable, however, was the friendliness and welcome of the people. Everywhere I went, I met people who were more than happy to show me around, give me info and generally help me out – which is why I’m so suprised whenever I see people who are clearly NOT friendly – like this girl:

不可否认的一点是人们很友好。我去的所有的地方，我见过的所有的人都很乐意带我转转，给我信息并且帮助我-这也是为什么当我看到那么明显的不友好的人会如此惊讶-比如这个女孩：

What sort of welcome is that for a lonely fresh-off-the-plane expat? I was considering having a word with her and trying to let her know that it’s not polite to be so abrupt with people…until I saw the front…

对于一个孤身来此的外国人这是哪门子的友好？我正想告诉她这样对人不礼貌而且非常鲁莽…直到我看到前面…

…now that’s more like it! Welcome to Shanghai!

…现在才像话！欢迎来上海！

This is almost beyond a joke… (不是开玩笑的…)

I hate spam as much as anyone, but come on man…give me a break!

我比谁都痛恨垃圾邮件，可是……放过我吧！

Is that pi?!?!

这是派吗？！？！

Fake DVD shop life lesson #1 (盗版DVD商店教训之一)

I absolutely love our local fake DVD shop. THere are two floors of movies, music dvds, cds and tv series. The people who work in there are always funny and relaxed and they’ll be honest with you if the quality of the disc is not exactly ’100%’.

我真心喜欢我们这里的盗版DVD商店。2层楼都是电影，音乐，cd和电视剧。在那里的工作人员总是很有意思并且很放松，而且如果片子的质量不是100%的好，他们绝对会如实告诉你。

I went in last week and spent a bit of time in one of my favourite sections – Classic Movies.

上个星期我去哪里花了点时间选我最喜欢的一个部分的片子-经典电影。

I haven’t seen ‘Weather Man’, but I’m sure it’s a real classic (because everything Nicolas Cage touches turns to gold). Part drama, part action film…and part philosophy?

我没看过‘天气预报员’，但是我相信这是个经典的片子（因为Nicolas Cage能点石成金）。一点情节，一点动作的片子…还有一点哲学？

I couldn’t have said it butter myself, Nick.
我已经说得够清纯了, Nick.

Blogstar.TV – Episode 2 – Party for the Party (博客之星-第2集-盛会的聚会)

I’m happy to announce that we’ve just released Episode 2 of Blogstar.TV – the web series / TV show / documentary / rockumentary that has been taking Shanghai, China and the World by storm.

非常高兴地在此隆重宣布,博客之星第2集新鲜出炉了-这部席卷全球,中国,上海的网络系列片/电视真人秀/记录片

If you like it, please do me a favour and share with your friends on Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, Kaixin001, RenRen, QQ or anywhere you can think of! I really appreciate it!

Don’t forget to leave a comment here on the official site too -> Blogstar.TV Episode 2 Party for the Party !

如果你喜欢,请帮我在Facebook,Myspace,Twitter,Kaixin001,Renren,QQ或者任何你想得到的地方和你的朋友分享这个视频!别忘记留下你的评论在我们的官方网站-> 博客之星-第2集-盛会的聚会!

Customer service in Shanghai (上海客服)

Some people moan about customer service in Shanghai, but I found one café near my workplace which actually thanks you if you take the piss out of them!

有些人常常抱怨上海的客服，可是我发现我工作的地方旁边的一个咖啡馆，他们会感谢你如果你拿他们开玩笑！

I wonder what they’d do if you didn’t pay?

我在想，如果你吃霸王餐他们会拿你怎么样？

Blogstar.TV Episode 2 Trailer (博客之星第二集预告片)

So there’s a trailer going round for the second episode of the MOST POPULAR TV SHOW IN THE HISTORY OF THE INTERNET, Blogstar.TV.

互联网史上最流行的电视系列片，博客之星-第二集预告片闪亮登场！

I just want to test out whether the video can be embedded! Visit the site at www.blogstar.tv and watch it for yourself :D
我只是想试试看这个视频能不能被插入播放。访问www.blogstar.tv，自己看吧!

Tragic love story in 6 words (六个字的作文)

I usually try not to reprint things here (or take things from other places), but I absolutely love this picture which was taken from a Chinese exam paper (allegedly). If you like this sort of story, there are loads of funny videos and funny photos from China at Funny in China – 趣味中国!

通常我都不会转帖到这里（或者把别的地方的东西拿来用），但是我真的很喜欢这张中国考卷（真心的）。如果你也喜欢这样的小品，可以上Funny in China – 趣味中国!，那里有很多有趣的视频和图片！

It says:
Question
Write an article about love.

Requirements
1. Use brief and refined language
2. The story should end tragically
3. No word limit

Answer
Will you marry me?
“Fuck off!”

The luckiest man in China (me!) (中国最幸运的人)

After watching Derren Brown’s prediction of the Lotto numbers back home in England (our household still can’t work out how he did it!), lottery-fever has gripped…me. China does have a lottery (China Welfare Lottery) and its sales go towards funding social welfare projects (hence the name). As you probably (don’t) remember, I already (basically) won the jackpot on the English lottery (see Beating the Credit Crunch – Part 1 – The Spree), so I needed to find something which was a little more difficult to win than a ‘lottery’.

在英国的家里看完Derren Brown的乐透号码预测后（我的家庭始终不知道为什么他能做到！），彩票热就此笼罩着…我。中国确实也有彩票（中国福利彩票），而且卖了是为了对社会福利项目提供资金（因此得名）。正如你可能（不）记得的，我已经（基本）中过英国的彩票（见赶跑信贷危机阴霾-第1部分-狂欢），所以我需要找些比’彩票’更难中的东西。

There has never been a better invention in world history. A scratch card, given for free as part of your receipt in a restaurant or bar, which gives you the chance of winning cash money FOR FREE! Amazing? Yes. Innovative? Sure. Impossible to win? Damn right.

这是史无前例的最好的发明。刮刮卡，免费出现在你从餐厅或酒吧得到的发票上，也就是说它给你一个免费赢现金的机会！神奇吗？是的。创新吗？当然。不可能中？确实。

I have done in-depth, scientific research on this topic, and it turned out that nobody had ever won anything scratching these receipts. Some people knew somebody who’d met somebody who had a friend who’d won, but nobody could put the cold, hard evidence in my hand and say ‘Oli, I’m a winner!’.

关于这个主题，我做了深入的科学研究，事实证明，没有人通过刮发票中过奖。有些人说他们认识的朋友的朋友的谁曾经好像中过，可是我不介意别人泼我冷水，铁的事实在我的手中，说着’Oli，我赢了！’。

Fittingly, it was a Wednesday night (the one week anniversary of Derren Brown’s TV lottery stunt) when we sat down for hot-pot. There was a mood of excitement, a nervous calm before the storm of luck which was about to erupt on our table.

那是一个星期三的晚上（Derren Brown的电视彩票特技一周周年庆）我们在吃火锅的时候。有一种令人兴奋的心情，好运来临之前的宁静，好象马上就要爆发在这张桌子上了。

When I handed over the cash for the bill, there seemed to be a golden glow surrounding the palms of the waitress, like a Ryu fireball about to be fired across the room. It was time. Scratch, scratch…

就在我付现金的时候，似乎看到女服务员的手掌被金色光芒环绕着，就好像是个将要被发射穿过整个房间的火球。我想是时候了。我刮，我刮，我刮刮刮…

We were ecstatic, hugging and cheering…dancing a little…high-5ing…we had broken the curse and proved that nothing is impossible, and impossible is nothing.

我们欣喜若狂，互相拥抱，欢呼… 跳舞…击掌…我们已经打破了诅咒，证明没有什么是不可能的，以及没有什么是不可能的。

Now, where do we cash it in?!

现在，我们要去哪里兑现它呢？！