Spamrogance

After working as the ‘IT guy’ at a company for 5 years, I’ve seen a lot of spam. Whenever I opened up my inbox I would be confronted with maybe 20 messages, with the usual V1@GRA titles (or some funnier ones, like ‘my SPERM volume has TRIPLED since taking this CUMpills‘ – I wasn’t aware that people felt like low sperm volume was a self-confidence issue)..anyway…

Some people get mad at spam…they get tricked into clicking on links, installing viruses and spyware, have their bank info hacked and generally screw up their computers. I don’t. I can spot spam. I know the difference between an email from Paypal and an email from P@yp@l. Well at least I thought I did…

Last night, 5am, this message is sitting in my Gmail inbox:

Click to read!

So do I know someone called lucy marjory? No.

Is my name jkoptie? No.

Do I even watch Heroes? Not since I found out the Cheerleader wasn’t going to get naked.

So why the filter did I click on the link in the email?! Well, two reasons. Firstly, I was hammer-drunk. Not an excuse, but a mitigating factor. Secondly, CURIOSITY! I like to watch ‘underground’ videos (not THOSE SORT OF VIDEOS)…like alternate endings to films (I am Legend)…stuff banned from TV (Jerry Springer ‘I married a horse’ anyone?)…and of course – celebrity sex tapes (ok that is THAT SORT OF VIDEO, but it’s Paris!).

But sadly, curiosity killed the cat…and the link in the email lead to a lot of pussy (I didn’t check if it was dead) and nothing to do with blogs or Heroes. I was devastated. My spamrogance(tm) blinded me to the obvious hallmarks of a fake email. I’m big enough to admit it, because I don’t want anyone else to fall like I did.

My advice – If you think you’ll never be tricked into clicking on a spam link, you’re wrong. If you feel stupid when you ask your nerdy friend for advice about whether your bank REALLY needs you to reconfirm your address, don’t worry – you’re just watching your back and being responsible. Good for you.

Oh yeah, and don’t check your email when drunk…or you might end up with three litres of $3/\/\3/\/ in the post. Try explaining that to your girlfriend.

Hottest day of the year

Open Championship starts tomorrow!Today is meant to be the hottest day of the year, with temperatures reaching 36 degrees celsius. With this in mind, check out this hot joke:A man goes into a café and says “Garcon! One cup of coffee please! No sugar! No cream!”.
The waiter scuttles away, and comes back 30 seconds later emptyhanded: “Sorry Sir, we have run out of cream, would no milk do instead?”

“Doogie Howser, MD” (1989)
Neil Patrick Harris – He must have been really depressed when Doogie Howser finished…although he did make it into Quantum Leap and The Outer Limits which would have put a few crumbs on the table…

Many cereals are ‘high in sugar’ – Some breakfast cereals contain as much fat as a bacon roll – Then just eat a bacon roll, they’re 10x nicer than crappy Frosties.

Europe’s first addiction clinic for video gamers opens – Epix holidayz

Outrage at racist ringtone in SA

September launch for 103-inch TV – I’ve got something that’s 103 inches >:) …..no wait…millimetres…

Garage door remote triggers man’s erection – Turkish implant goes horribly…right?

World Cup streaming fails to score – Turns out that no one was interested in watching footy online. Well, one in 10 was interested, and he’d only got lost when Googling that rude film with Lea off Big Brother in it. – Guilty…

Nazi Goth Asian Midgets – For our friend in Taiwan

Breakdancing Baby – Baby got back? (sorry)

Today

I
bought this CD walkman. Also got some good albums. I’ll put a list of
the albums I got this Christmas up soon…some really great ones in
there. The first song I listened to on the walkman? Jay-Z – “Ain’t No
Love” from the Blueprint album.

I watched some films today…oh God I feel sick as I type these:
Romancing The Stone – A classic? I remembered it better than it was I think.
The Amazing Howard Hughes – Tommy Lee Jones goes mental. Very sssslllloooowwwlllllyyyy.
Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!
- From the Daily Telegraph TV Guide: “(1965) Erotic drama starring Tura
Satana and Lori Williams.”. From Oliworld.co.uk Film Guide:”(1965)
Shit.”.